


the power to break

by AFireInTheAttic



Series: See the Stars [7]
Category: Twilight (Movies), Twilight Series - All Media Types, Twilight Series - Stephenie Meyer
Genre: F/F, Familial Relationships, Reconciliation, the meadow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-04
Updated: 2019-01-10
Packaged: 2019-08-17 14:41:31
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 8,092
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16518425
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AFireInTheAttic/pseuds/AFireInTheAttic
Summary: There were several mature responses to watching an older brother seemingly try to break up a budding relationship, but Edythe wasn’t interested in any of them. She didn’t like arguing with her family, even when they were in the wrong. Especially not now, when she thought that maybe Emmett was right to try and stop things.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hey guys, sorry for the long wait! This chapter really fought me. I’m trying to work on this (and a few other stories) for nanowrimo, so hopefully you’ll see a few more updates this month! Fingers crossed :)

There were several mature responses to watching an older brother seemingly try to break up a budding relationship, but Edythe wasn’t interested in any of them. She didn’t like arguing with her family, even when they were in the wrong. Especially not now, when she thought that maybe Emmett was right to try and stop things.

Still. She was allowed to be bitter, so she let her irritation show as she stormed across the parking lot toward her car. Several students practically jumped out of her way and gaped at her, but she ignored them. Her display wouldn’t really do much to actually intimidate Emmett, who was stronger than her, if a little slower. If it came to a fistfight, they’d be pretty evenly matched, and her brother knew it. Still, it felt good to drop her harmless human facade, even if only slightly. Anger was a hell of a drug.

She’d wished a hundred times that she could stop hearing everyone’s thoughts. This afternoon made a hundred and one—she could hear Mike’s grumbling complaints about Bella’s rejection, Alice rapidly cycling through visions—maddeningly, they hadn’t changed at all since Emmett’s declaration—and Emmett somehow generating the equivalent of mental white noise, louder than everything else probably because Edythe was so focused on him.

“You fucking ass,” she muttered.

Emmett was standing on the opposite side of the Volvo, like having a car between them might stop her from ripping him apart. He pressed his lips tightly together and stared at her with guarded eyes. The white noise in his mind let up for one second, long enough for Edythe to see the concern—the same concern Rose and Jasper had expressed after the car accident, but more subtle, more calculated than simple murder.

She scowled, and the white noise started up again. She couldn’t stand to be around it—or the person producing it.

“I have to stay after class to speak to Señora Goff,” she lied, pointedly. It would make it that much more frustrating for Emmett that she was obviously lying about their shared class. She tossed Alice the keys. “Will you take everyone home? I’ll be busy for a while.”

“Sure,” Alice said, and immediately handed Jasper the keys. “But I’m too...I can’t drive right now.”

“Fine. I’ll see you at home.” She spun on her heel before she could get any angrier at Emmett’s stony silence and walked back toward the Spanish building.

Señora Goff was already gone for the day, but it worked out in her favor. She didn’t actually want to speak to anyone. There were fewer students around inside the cluster of the school buildings, and it was easy to slip their notice. She paused briefly next to the door to the Spanish classroom and knocked. No answer, of course, but she pretended to wait and then peer into the classroom.

It began to rain, and that cleared the remaining students from the area, albeit slowly.

Only Angela Weber was still there, but she was tucked under the alcove of a classroom, hunched over her phone, certainly not paying attention.

Edythe was curious about Angela, so she tuned into her thoughts briefly.

‘—maybe it’s nothing, but it just seems like I’m not alone any more...no, crap, I can’t send her that.It will seem like she’s not enough which is—ugh. Ok, maybe...maybe you’re right, maybe she is trustworthy. Talk to her tonight but don’t tell her about...’

Usually she could ignore the greater implications of her gift. She only heard surface thoughts, but that meant she’d caught onto more than a few private things that she knew people would be embarrassed about. This struck her as one of them. Angela was anxious about texting Jessica, but Edythe didn’t need to know the details. With care, she turned her thoughts away.

Anyway, she could leave without much suspicion now.

She walked past the cluster of buildings, toward the woods. There were always rumors about seniors sneaking out here to smoke and fuck, but as far as she could smell, it happened rarely, if ever. Still, mindful that today could be the day that changed, she walked deeper into the woods before taking off at full speed.

Her shoes—dark brown Oxfords—weren’t built for running, she realized about two miles in. She flitted to a stop, kicked them off, and fell back into a sprint. Alice might get angry about it, but she liked a very specific shoe and had several pairs of them. Anyway, they’d come back into style, so she didn’t need to worry about holding onto them as much. No biggie.

She pressed herself to go faster. She was only about three miles away from her meadow, but she was always curious. How fast could she go? She’d never really tested it, but she knew what her approximate limit felt like. She wasn’t quite there yet, that was easier to reach over flat, bare landscapes. No trees to dodge, just open air. The last time that had happened...must have been Alaska, or Nunavut, maybe.

She reached the meadow faster than she normally would have, given her pushed speed.

She always thought of this place as her own. She didn’t know if anyone else ever went there, aside from animals that occasionally passed through.

It’s not as beautiful in the rain as it is in the sun, but it’s still a comfort to sit alone in the quiet, no one else’s thoughts intruding on her own.

She lies down in the center of the meadow, breathes in the smell of wet earth, and goes still.

She can’t stop picturing Bella’s frozen face. She can’t stop hearing the way her heart had raced or her soft, shocked gasp.

“This is...weird,” she says to the empty clearing, her voice an almost perfect replication of Bella’s, though not quite as sweet. “I need some time to process it.”

Saying the words aloud didn’t make her feel any better.

The truth was, what Emmett did only brought her back into the complicated swirl of emotions. She knew that she had deep feelings for Bella and that she wanted more than anything to be with her, but those same feelings also made her feel like she needed to run away, to secure herself somewhere else, where she wouldn’t have to deal with any of it. And of course, she was constantly worried that she would hurt Bella. A large part of her still struggled not to to take whenever she smelled Bella, and that was every day! What if, one day soon, she couldn’t stop herself and did drink her blood? Alice’s visions couldn’t be trusted at the moment.

“This is...weird,” she murmured again. Weird didn’t begin to cover it, Bella.

Edythe might not know Bella’s mind, but there were a few things she could read—Bella was close to figuring things out, for example. She’d understandably read Edythe’s initial dismissiveness as homophobia, but once that had been eliminated, she’d started picking closer to the truth. That was dangerous, too.

Edythe sighed. She kept going over the same arguments in her head. She wanted Bella’s affection, and she wanted to figure her out, but she also wanted her blood, and to keep her from finding out about vampires. To keep her from endangering her family.

Bella could be part of the family, someday, though…

It’s an errant thought—the first time she’d even had it. She’d allowed herself to focus on Alice’s pretty dream of “I love yous,” but never past that. Any more seemed selfish somehow.

But…if she were to become part of the family…wouldn’t it be important to bring her in closer?

She sighed. Same arguments, over and over.

She lied still for a long time, watching the sky get darker. The rain was cold on her skin, though slowly she stopped noticing it. She could hear some kind of small animal—a rabbit, maybe—moving around in the brush nearby. When the crickets started chirping, she knew it was time to go face the music. To face Emmett.

When she thought about what had happened, she still felt so angry. She thought that everyone had decided to defer to her when it came to Bella Swan. And maybe that wasn’t fair to them—after all, she wasn’t the leader or anything like that, but…she knew Bella better than anyone else did.

The run home was easy enough that she even doubled back to the school to pick up her shoes. They were ruined, predictably, and Alice would probably scold her, but Edythe figured not leaving them behind was probably a better move.

‘Oh, thank god,’ was the first thought she heard when she got close to the house. Esme. She must have been in her greenhouse to have been the first to hear Edythe running back. She changed course so that she would stop there.

It was dark inside the greenhouse, but Esme didn’t need any light to see, so Edythe wasn’t surprised. “Hi,” she said softly from the doorway.

The warmth was, as ever, inviting, though to a human it might be too humid. It was a nice change after being caught in the rain, though, so Edythe relished in it.

“Hello, sweetheart,” Esme answered, darting over to wrap Edythe up in her arms. “Are you alright? I heard there was a bit of a scuffle with Emmett earlier.”

“We haven’t scuffled yet,” she said, smiling a little. She settled into her embrace with ease. Esme was the closest thing Edythe still had to a mother, and in moments like this, she was extremely grateful.

The greenhouse smelled beautiful. It’s mostly full of flowers, but there were sections of herbs and vegetables along the wall, too. Old bumblebee hives were lined on one shelf—in a few months, Esme would try to catch a new queen and set her up in the greenhouse.

This place felt more like Esme than any where else ever did. Sure, she had designed the house, and it was beautiful and felt like home, but the lushness of the greenhouse, the way she almost seemed to melt into the scenery—she belonged here.

“Come,” she said, and pulled Edythe toward the orchids she’d been tending to. She didn’t ask any more details, like she was the mind reader instead of Edythe, and knew that she wasn’t ready to discuss it.

Though, truthfully, she thought she should be. She was older than everyone in her family aside from Carlisle and Jasper, yet also the youngest. Sometimes, even knowing she shouldn’t be upset, she couldn’t stop herself. Being eternally eighteen was just horrible.

She could hear Emmett in the house, but she ignored him for now, as she quietly worked with Esme on the orchids.

Alice and Jasper were reading in the living room. A new crate of books must have arrived. Both of them were flashing through the books, so fast that, without focusing, Edythe caught only snippets of their reactions to the books. Alice was reading a YA novel, she thought, based on her amusement. Jasper was probably reading one of the true crime novels he enjoyed.

Rose was in the garage, working on the ‘89 Mustang she’d recently acquired. Not quite a classic car, but technically an antique. She might sell it when she was done, but maybe not. Emmett was with her...

Carlisle was upstairs, in his study, writing an email to...she wasn’t sure, but she thought it might be for Tanya. That was nice. Aside from her brief trip to Alaska, none of them had seen their coven in quite some time. It would be nice to have a longer visit with them soon, maybe even staying nearby for a year or so...

Emmett left the garage to go to his room.

Edythe poured some water into a watering can and started pouring the precise amount required by an orchid. She passed the can to Esme after a moment, so she could take care of the ones in her reach.

If Edythe confessed her feelings, the way she’s confessed them to Alice and Rose, she thought Esme would understand, would be supportive. With fewer reservations than Rose, even. Edythe wasn’t sure that she wanted to encourage false hope in her, though.

Esme set the watering can down. She smiled at her softly and tilted her head back toward the house. ‘I’m all done in here. I’m going to see Carlisle. Walk with me?’ As always, her thoughts were kind. She offered an arm to her.

Arm in arm, they walked across the yard. The house was like a lantern in the darkness; an entire wall of lights shone through. Alice waved at them from her bedroom, holding a book that she was almost finished with.

Inside, they separated. Esme wasn’t very wet, having spent only a few moments outside, and wearing a raincoat to boot. Edythe was soaked, though, so she hurried to her room, where she stripped out of her clothes, tossed them in the laundry basket, and then took a quick shower.

Emmett was still in his room when she got out of the shower. A quick peek at his thoughts showed that he was browsing the political section of a news site. He always did that when he was nervous.

Sighing, she dried off and dressed quickly in soft pajamas. She wouldn’t be sleeping, of course, but it would be nice to be physically comfortable while having a very uncomfortable conversation.

Vampire speed was incredibly convenient usually, and always exhilarating, but in this moment, she hated it. Why was she already standing outside Emmett’s door?

Never mind, she told herself, and knocked.

He opened the door, his thoughts, funnily enough, also irritated with his speed. It made her laugh a little, and he looked at her askance.

“Nothing,” she muttered. “I just had the same thought.”

He smiled at that, and gestured for her to join him in the room. There were two chairs, a table between them that Rose used for car repair plans and that Emmett sketched at.

They say across from each other, both quietly contemplating.

‘I’m sorry that I hurt you,’ Emmett thought gently. ‘I knew you wouldn’t be happy with me talking to Bella. I was just worried.’

To be honest, she had known this. Emmett could be an ass, but he wasn’t needlessly cruel. “I know,” she allowed.

‘You were hurt, though. I...I hope...she’s not what I expected.’

That made her laugh softly. “Me either.”

‘She’s funny. I can see why you like her.’

“Rose told you?” She was a little...disappointed. Not that she expected Emmett to react negatively, it was just...she would have liked to tell him.

‘Oh, no. I figured it out, I’m, the day of the accident... I actually didn’t mean to let on that I knew. Sorry.’

“It’s okay.” She considered her brother thoughtfully. The conversation he’d had with Bella still confused her. If he’d known her at all, he would have known that it wouldn’t scare her away, but instead make her more curious...although somewhat more distant. Based on Alice’s visions, that wouldn’t last long, though.

And maybe that was the problem. He didn’t know Bella. “You were trying to protect the family, right?”

He nodded. ‘I’m not sure how well that worked, though.’

She chuckled and nodded.

‘For what it’s worth, I like her. If any one is going to endanger the family by finding out what we are, she seems like a good candidate. And...I do want you to have...someone. Love.’ Emmett offered her a hand across the table, and she took it. He squeezed gently.

“I’m still mad at you,” she told him.

He nodded.

If she was absolutely fair, she knew her anger was selfish. Emmett had tried to protect her family and the human she was obsessed with in a non-lethal way. Sure, it had been uninformed, but in a sense it had worked to make Bella more aware of the situation, and the danger she was in. What had really made her angry was that he’d acted on his own, without her permission. And, she reminded herself, he didn’t need her permission to do...well, anything.

Plus, there was the whole way his actions had caused her to go into a self-flagellating spiral of indecision and regret.

Maybe that was healthy from time to time.

Well, probably not.

In any case, she realized, sitting here, that her desires hadn’t changed. She was still going to pursue a relationship with Bella.

That is, if Bella would have her. The ball was certainly in her court in that regard, and all that was left to do now was...wait.

Oh, and one other thing.

“I’ve been reliably informed that you were hangry, today,” she said to Emmett.

He grimaced. ‘Shut up.’

“Or,” she said, reaching across the table to poke his shoulder. “Let’s go hunt.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edit 6/18/19: Changed Edythe's age to 18 versus 17.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Weeee're back! I've been looking forward to writing this conversation for a while, so obviously as I was trying to do so, it was tougher than expected...But I'm pretty satisfied with the end result.
> 
> This does feature a discussion of childhood sexuality. It's not inappropriate or voyeuristic, it's just a discussion of Bella explaining how she realized she was bi! It's actually based on personal experience, which is how I know it's really just a normal thing. 
> 
>  
> 
> **That being said, if these kind of discussions make you uncomfortable, you can skip the paragraph starting with "Easy, and also probably not what she meant to ask." and keep skipping until "Huh," Jess said.**

Dad—

I went to study with Jessica Stanley. Dinner is ready on the stove! Might be back late. Text me if you need me home sooner.

Love you!  
Bella

P.s. You should answer your text messages so I know you got them…

* * *

Forks was pretty simple to navigate, once you figured out where the main roads were. That was a good thing, because Bella’s phone didn’t get the best signal, and GPS wasn’t an option. She relied on her instincts to make it to the address Jess had texted her.

Jess was easy to spot on the street, wearing a bright blue raincoat with the hood pulled up. Her rain boots were the same color. She waved when she saw Bella’s truck approaching.

She leaned over to unlock the passenger for as she pulled up alongside her. “Where to?” she asked as Jess settled in.

“Would you be opposed to coffee? I know Edythe bought you some earlier, but it’s fucking freezing out here. I can _not_ wait for April.” She shivered for emphasis.

“Sure,” she agreed. “Mocha Motion? You’ll have to direct me there.” She’d never been before, but the latte had been pretty good.

“No, they close at six,” she sighed. “Which sucks because they have the best coffee in town. But, whatever! Pay and Save works, too.”

That one Bella did know how to get to, even from Jess’s unfamiliar street. It was Charlie’s favorite coffee shop in Forks. He brought cups of the stuff all the time and had taken her there regularly enough since she moved in that the baristas knew her by name. For his birthday, she was planning to buy him a travel thermos. If he was going to drink five cups a day, he should at least stop filling the local dump with paper cups.

Jess started to direct her, which Bella didn’t mind. It was nice to lose herself in the directions a bit, to not worry about the conversations they were about to have.

There was something about car rides that Bell had always found sacred. The rain was pattering, soft tonight, but still present. Bella’s windshield wipers were the newest part of the car, purchased by her dad just a few days ago. He got the ones with Rain-X, so the water was beading prettily in the window. Combined with the streetlights, the was almost a magical feel in the cab of the car.

Jess sighed as they got back onto main street. The sound didn’t break that quiet, sacred spell, but it made Bella glance at her.

She was almost glowing in the dim light. Streetlights haloed around her hair and her dark skin had an almost blue tint from the dusky light outside.

She met Bella’s eyes for a moment and smiled. She didn’t look…upset. Maybe distant, though.

Bella looked back at the road. There was a turn she didn’t want to miss, soon, and if she kept watching her friend, there was no guarantee she wouldn’t.

“I…don’t know exactly…I’m sorry that I worried you,” Jess said quietly. Bella could hear her messing with the zipper on her coat, fiddling with the pull tab. “Turn right up here.”

“It’s okay,” Bella said as they turned onto Forks Avenue.

There was a pause, pregnant almost. The turn signal broke the silence as they arrived at the shop, and Jess sighed quietly. “Sorry,” she said.

Bella parked the car. She wasn’t sure what to say yet, not until she knew more about what was going on in Jess’s head. She had never really had a lot of friends, back in Phoenix, just people that she tended to pair with for homework and group projects. And sure, there were people she’d eaten lunch with, the kind of casual acquaintances formed by people who don’t really connect with any one else. She had thought, up until lunch today, that Jess was kind of the same type. Friendly, smart enough to do projects with, a decent mealtime companion. But when she’d stopped Mike…multiple times, actually, from getting too close? From asking her to the dance, from sitting next to her… Jess had proved herself to be more committed than any previous friend had been.

Bella wanted to be more committed to her, too. Yelling at Mike might have been a start, but she was pretty sure that to really connect, she should probably come out. Something she’d never had to do with a friend before.

People had probably been aware that she wasn’t straight, on some level. She’d crushed on girls before, even kissed one behind the school during lunch one day. She’d never hidden it, but she’d realized pretty early on that no one really paid attention to queerness in girls, so it hadn’t ever been anything that regularly caused her problems.

Not that it had been easy, by any means. There had been girls who wouldn’t change in front of her in gym, girls who flinched if Bella brushed against them while passing by. It was unpleasant, but ultimately not important—none of them had been friends, and she’d moved away now, anyway. The few friends she was still connected with on Snapchat only sent her snaps of their pets and dinner—no one missed her or though about her, really. And honestly, she didn’t think about them.

(She knew she was lucky, that there were girls out there who got punished for who they were, by parents or by others in their lives. She wasn’t exactly a stranger to that—Grandma Dwyer was no peach, but over all, it had only resulted in a few awkward social situations.)

Jess was a friend, though, one of her first. And so her opinion mattered. If she pulled away, Bella wasn’t sure what she’d do. She didn’t think she was close enough to Edythe to start sharing lunch every day. And she desperately did not want to lose Jess, or Angela, for that matter.

Inside the coffee shop, there were a couple tables scattered around. Soft acoustic music played over the speakers, almost too quiet to hear. In all the times they’d gone to grab coffee, she and Charlie were usually in and out. It was rare for her to sit down in a coffee shop—her mom couldn’t handle the stuff, and Charlie was always on the go. It would be nice to sit and enjoy the place.

Bella examined the menu. Usually she enjoyed a variety of flavored lattes, but she probably shouldn’t have so much caffeine, since Edythe had brought her the latte earlier that day. But the idea of drinking decaf turner her stomach. It was always way too bitter. Maybe the best thing to do now would be to order hot chocolate.

Jess was already at the counter. There was no line this time of day, though there were a couple people in the cafe, mostly sitting alone and working on laptops or reading books. There was one couple talking quietly in the corner. “You ready?” Jess asked, drawing her attention back. She seemed to have already ordered, if the expectant way she was looking at Bella was any indication.

She hurried over to join her. “Can I get a hot chocolate? No whip cream, please.”

The barista typed in the order and then read off the total. Jess paid before Bella could wrestle her wallet out of her pocket. It was the second time it had happened that day, and the third time someone had bought her something, what with the coffee and the lunch from Edythe. She frowned. “I’m buying next time,” she told her pointedly. How would she repay Edythe, though? Obviously she didn’t eat or drink anything…

Jess smiled and nodded slightly as she took her change.

They took an empty table near the hand-off area, settling in while they waited.

Underneath her blue raincoat, Jess was wearing the same shirt she’d worn to school that day, notable because of it’s soft green color.

Bella had added an over-sized sweater to her ensemble that she’d stolen from Charlie a few weeks ago. It was quickly becoming her favorite top. It was absolutely ugly, but extremely comfortable. The air always cooled at night in Forks, and she was feeling it, as usual. Charlie had laughed a little the second time he’d seen her wearing it while doing homework, but hadn’t asked for it to be returned. She took that to mean he was fine with sharing.

Despite the sweater, she shivered a bit as the quietly chatting couple left the shop, blowing in some cold air. The hot chocolate was sounding better and better.

The song playing change to an acoustic cover of a song that Bella kind of recognized but couldn’t quite place. She stared at the space above Jess’s shoulder, wondering exactly how this conversation was going to start. A big part of her wanted to take back her questions and just spend the evening chatting about homework and school gossip.

But Jess _was_ her friend. And she wanted her to know who she was. Not to mention that they needed to talk about Mike, for all that he deserved none of their attention.

She steeled herself to speak, but the barista called their drinks before she could get a word out.

Once again, Jess moved before Bella had time to react. She tapped the table next to her arm. “I got ‘em.” She brought back ceramic white mugs and slid Bella’s across the table. She took a sip of her drink—Bella missed what it was—and after setting it down, said, “I really didn’t mean to upset you earlier today, or anything like that. I knew you…well, I knew you were at least as interested in the Cullens as I was, so when I ran into Edythe this morning, I was just going to tell you about it! She was saying that you two had been texting…and I guess I thought maybe you had some juicy deets.” She shrugged. “But then you had that coffee, and I was pretty sure Edythe had only ordered one drink. I guess, I wondered…” She trailed off, took a sip of her drink, and stared down at the table.

Now might be a good time to tell her, but Bella found herself shying away from the idea. “I don’t know how Edythe considers us,” she said. “But I consider her a friend.”

“She said you guys have been talking about homework.”  
“Yeah,” she agreed. It wasn’t really true, aside from their single discussion about _Pride and Prejudice_. Still…Jess didn’t really need to know the details about Edythe’s secrets.

“It’s just…you don’t really act much like…friends.”

Bella could hear the question there, and she was pretty sure she knew where it was leading. “We don’t hang out much at school,” she admitted. She _could_ _do_ _this_. She took a gulp of hot chocolate, like it was liquid courage. “We’ve been texting, though. And um…I guess it’s pretty obvious that I have a crush on her.”

If Jess was surprised, she didn’t show it; instead she looked immediately relieved. She grabbed Bella’s hand. “Oh, my gosh. Does she like you, too?”

“Not sure,” she said. She was pretty sure that Edythe did return her feelings, but honestly, she had a hard time believing that it was on the same level. Edythe was…perfect. And she knew, intellectually, that she was likable enough, but the distance between being a decent enough person and being _flawless_ was miles long. Edythe had no reason to like her in the same way. And anyway, it wasn’t her place to tell Jess about Edythe’s sexuality.

Across the table, Jess frowned. “I think she does. She bough you coffee. I’ve never seen her do that for anyone else, not even her siblings.” She paused, then took another sip. “The only time I’ve even seen her loan something was like…once Lauren borrowed a pencil from her?”

“Who’s Lauren?” she asked. Inwardly, she was distracted—why were Edythe and her family so standoffish? If they just talked to people they wouldn’t stand out nearly as much…and any standing out they did would be purely based on how pretty they all were. Other oddities could be excused as tricks of the light. Standing alone just highlighted their differences.

“She used to go here, but she dropped out to kickstart her modeling career last summer. She’s been in _Seventeen_ a few times, so I guess she’s doing okay?” She sounded like she wasn’t quite sure, but also like she figured everything would eventually work out.

“Her parents went for it?”

“Yeah. There was a scout and a contract. Very lucrative, apparently. “ She pointed at Bella with a scowl. “You’re changing the subject.”

Bella held up her hands defensively. “I’m nervous! It’s not like I come out to friends every day!”

Obviously abashed, she dropped her gazed covered her mouth. “I’m sorry. I skipped right over…thanks for trusting me. I’m glad you did.”

There was the relief she’d been hoping to feel. Jess had been positive, but now there was trust. She exhaled. “I’m glad I could.”

Apparently satisfied, Jess looked up at her slyly now. “So. Edythe, hmm?”

She tried not to groan. “Yes.”

“Tell me!” she begged, grabbing one of Bella’s hands. “Is it because she’s so dreamy? Did the two of you meet up to discuss biology and find chemistry instead?”

“Oh, god.” Bella covered her face with her free hand and thought about taking her other hand back to do the same. The touch was reassuring, though. “That’s terrible. How long did it take you to think up?”

“Like, two seconds. Terrible jokes are a skill, and I’m level 100, baby!” They both laughed a little too loudly at that and got a scowl from one of the people tapping away at their keyboard.

Jess waved apologetically. Quietly, she asked, “But seriously, what’s she like?”

“Amazing,” she murmured, staring at her mug and wishing…wishing that Edythe was there right then. She wanted to know what the hell Emmett had meant. She wanted to know that it didn’t _matter_. “I love talking to her, even about stupid things. I want to get to know her. And…she _is_ dreamy.” She chuckled.

“That’s really nice,” Jess said, smiling at her softly and leaning toward her. “I can tell from how you talk about her how much she means to you.” She got a serious look on her face then. “But…her family…they’re kind of—“ She waved a hand around like she wasn’t exactly sure which work she as looking for. “Weird?” she tried at last.

“What do you mean?” She knew about her own list of Weird Cullen Things, but she wondered what they seemed like to someone who had been observing them for a while longer. And, of course, there was the ever-present need to protect their secret. Whatever it was.

“Like…keeping to themselves, dating each other. Doesn’t that seem…odd?”

“I’ve been avoiding thinking about that,” she admitted. “And I haven’t met any of Edythe’s siblings, really. Just Emmett.”

“Ah,” Jess said. In an extremely serious voice, she intoned, “Big Sexy.”

She could _hear_ the capitalization, and it made her dissolve into giggles, Jess following close behind. It was hard to be intimidated by a guy who teenage girls so easily nicknamed.

She pressed a hand over her mouth to stifle the laughter, ever mindful of the asshole who seemed to think this coffee shop was a library.

“But seriously,” Jess said once they’d calmed down a bit. “Be careful? Something about them is off.”

Bella nodded. These weren’t superstitions she could debunk. This was the very normal fear of a weird family dynamic, which, honestly, she could understand.

“Just make sure you aren’t joining a cult,” she said decisively.

“What, really?” _That_ was a little far-fetched. Why would someone create a cult centered in _Forks_ , of all places?

Although, that could be the point…

She shook the thought away. No, they weren’t a cult. They were just…superhuman. Or not human? Something like that.

Jess just shrugged. “How about you just keep me updated, and if they try to adopt you, I’ll kidnap you to keep you safe.” She winked.

Bella smiled back. Nice to know she had someone looking out for her, even if it wasn’t quite right. There was just one other thing bothering her, though. “So…this morning, when you stopped talking to me, it wasn’t because you were freaked out about me?”

“Freaked out about what now?” She genuinely looked confused.

“Some people get pretty…uh…they get awkward around me when they realize I’m…not straight.” Ugh, why was it so hard to get this stuff out?

Clarity dawned on Jess’s face, though, so at least she _was_ communicating what she meant.

“Oh! No, no. Wow, I’m sorry. Of course it doesn’t bother me. You’re not the first—“ She stopped mid-sentence, looking somewhat chagrined. “Could you forget I said that? Just the last part?”

There hadn’t been time to think about it before now, but Bella suddenly couldn’t help but think about the wistful way Angela talked about Jess and their friendship at lunch earlier that day. If Jess had been about too say Bella wasn’t her first gay friend, she thought she might know who was.

But that was private, and she shouldn’t assume, anyway. It was nice to see Jess wouldn’t out people without their consent, no matter who that friend was. So she nodded and drank her cocoa. “It’s forgotten,” she promised.

“All I really wanted to say is that it doesn’t change how I think of you. Maybe, if you ever wanted me to set you up with someone, I’d have different ideas than I did before, but other than that, nothing has changed.” Jess smiled at her warmly. “When I got quiet this morning, I was just thinking through things? And I thought maybe you were…a lesbian? And I didn’t want to drag it out of you, I wanted you to have the space to tell me. But obviously not there. I was just caught off guard and processing.”

It was pretty relieving. This was better than her dad coming to talk to her in her room, maybe. For perhaps only the second time, she wondered if Forks would become her home.

“Can I just ask you something, though?”

She shook herself out of her thoughts and looked at Jess a little nervously. That look on her face probably meant she was going to ask something offensive.

She considered her situation. Presumably, Jess was straight, which did indicate that there would be some amount of cluelessness regardless of her good intentions. She might put her foot in her mouth, but it would probably be survivable. She was hardly stubborn, and Bella could probably coax her in the right direction if she did say something awful.

Plus, it was better to have this conversation now, while she was braced for it. “Go for it.”

“Is it…I mean…how long have you known?”

Easy, and also probably not what she meant to ask. “Since I was 14. My mom gave me a second sex talk before I finished middle school about how it was okay to experiment. I think she mostly did it to piss off my grandma, but it was the first time someone ever told me girls were an option.”

“So…it’s not just Edythe? Or, uh, the Cullens in general? They’re all very…beautiful.”

“That’s putting it lightly,” she said, smiling slightly. “But no, it’s been my whole life.”

“I thought you said 14?”

She hummed in agreement. “That’s when I knew. But when I look back over my childhood, it’s more obvious. I had kiddie crushes on girls, that kind of thing. So I realized it was nothing new, I’ve always been bisexual.” She hesitated, then decided if she’d come this far, she might as well go all the way. “Not to mention I fantasized about girls like…as soon as I knew about sex.”

Jess frowned. “What?”

“Like—you know when you learn about sex and you start thinking about it and trying to figure it out in your head?”

Jess nodded, so she continued. “I thought about girls having sex together at least as regularly as I thought about girls having sex with guys.” She shrugged, a little awkward. This was more than she’d shared with anyone, and it was embarrassing, but also kind of great to say out loud. “It wasn’t weird at the time, but looking back it was a pretty obvious signal.”

“Huh,” Jess said.

It didn’t look like she was going to say any more for the time being, but Bella was still hesitant to ask the question that had jumped to mind. She couldn’t help but worry this would be the thing that ended up pushing Jess away. Still…she was curious. “You mentioned that all the Cullens are pretty beautiful.”

“Oh, yes,” she agreed immediately. She laughed a little. “I think that’s a pretty common feeling. Emmett is the cutest, if you ask me; something about Jasper is a little…scary? I’ve definitely daydreamed about Emmett and Rosalie, though. That has to be pretty hot.”

She couldn’t help but stare. That was pretty much exactly what she’d thought she’d heard, earlier. But she needed to clarify before she assumed, obviously. She tried to be casual about it. “So…Rosalie, too, huh?”

“Well, sure. That’s why I wondered if Edythe was an exception for you. They’re too pretty, you know?”

Jesus. Bella wondered if Jess knew she wasn’t straight, or if that was going to be a huge surprise for her to work out later. Should she say anything?

Based on the way Jess was acting—like it was perfectly straight to have a crush on a girl—she thought maybe she should wait. “I…uh…sure?”

Jess didn’t react to Bella’s uncertainty. She changed the subject. “Anyway, you said you had something to say about Mike?”

“Oh, right.” She grimaced. As much as she knew what should be said, this wasn’t something she was eager to broach. It was obvious that Jess liked a Mike a lot, and it always sucked to hear that your crush didn’t feel the same. “He…what exactly did he say to you when you asked him to the dance?”

She sighed and ran her fingers over the grooves in the table. “He wanted to think about it. Which really means ‘no, but I don’t want to say it.’”

“Yeah,” Bella said, automatically stretching the word out.

She stared down at the table, quiet when she said, “He asked you, right?”

“I said no,” she answered quickly. “Basically told him to go to hell? I’d like to imagine him rethinking his approach to life, but…”

Jess’s face said she knew he probably wasn’t, and that this was no real shock. She pushed a strand of hair out of her eyes and sighed. “I shouldn’t be upset.”

“Hey, why not? You liked him and he stomped on that, of course you’re upset.” Bella reached for her and smiled encouragingly. “It’s okay.”

“He really asked you? After lunch?”

She nodded, once again full of fury that teenage boys could be so cruel.

Jess’s face crumpled and she slumped forward. “Well, fuck.” She sniffled slightly and wiped her eyes. “That really fucking sucks. I’ve lived here for so long, and no one has ever liked me the way I like them, and—“ She pressed a hand to her mouth, like she was trying to stop the words from escaping.

Bella scooted her chair around the table until she could put an arm around her. “Hey, it’s okay. It’s okay to be upset. I get it.”

“No, you don’t! You get here and everyone is throwing themselves at your feet, like you’re a fucking princess.” She slapped her hand on the table, and then covered her mouth again. The shame was evident in her voice when she muttered, “Sorry, that’s not fair. It’s not your fault I’ve never had a boyfriend.”

Bella tried to remember if she’d ever had a conversation like this before. Maybe with her mom, who had no shortage of boyfriends that hadn’t worked out. When she had a crisis of confidence, Bella usually ended up listing everything she liked about her. Maybe that would work for Jess, too? “Hey, it’s his loss, right?” she tried. “You’re probably the nicest person in town. When I got here, everyone was curious, but you’re the one who went out of the way to be my friend.”

“Mike and Angela did that, too,” she said dismissively.

“But who am I getting coffee with?” she argued back. She decided it wasn’t the best move to mention that Mike had never wanted to be friends with her.

But Jess just shrugged, jostling the arm still around her. “Who cares?”

“I do,” she said, frowning. “Anyway, you’re _also_ really pretty. I’ve always thought your hair was beautiful.”

“Do _you_ like me like that?”

It was asked accusingly, and Bella immediately dropped her arm. Shit, had she crossed a line? Jess had been okay with everything before, but maybe that was only if she wasn’t the object of Bella’s affection. And she wasn’t, of course, but maybe even the idea was enough to change how she felt about their continuing friendship.

Jess seemed to realize she’d overstepped. “Sorry. I—I didn’t mean that it would be a problem if you did like me. And it’s not your job to gas me up.” She sighed. “I’m just hurt. Not because of you. I just thought I had a chance with Mike.”

Relaxing, Bella chanced her luck and touched Jess’s shoulder. She was still a little to hesitant to put an arm around her, but it was in her nature to offer comfort when someone was upset. “Mike being stupid doesn’t mean you aren’t likable. It’s like you said on the first day. I’m the shiny new toy.”

She grimaced at the memory. “That was mean. I’m sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” she said, waving a hand. It wasn’t a big deal. “It was true. I’m new here and that made me interesting. I bet if he really got to know me, if I’d been here all along, he wouldn’t care about me much at all.”

Jess didn’t look very convinced, but at least she looked less upset now. She wrapped her own arm around Bella and pulled her close. “I think…I’m gonna try to give up on him.” She downed the rest of her drink—just plain black coffee, it looked like, now that Bella was close enough to see—in one go. “Can we get out of here?”

“Of course.” Bella wasn’t through with her own drink, but she hadn’t paid for it, so it was no real loss. She picked up both mugs and returned them to the barista.

Jess looped her arm through Bella’s as they walked outside. “Thanks for listening.”

“Seriously, any time. It was nice to hang out outside of school.” If they hadn’t been friends before now, they certainly were now.

Jess tugged her into a hug. “One thing I know for sure is that Edythe likes you back.” She didn’t quite whisper it, but she leaned close to Bella’s ear to say it softly. “I’m not gonna tell any one or anything, but I thought you should know. It’s obvious if you pay attention. Like I said, no one else gets coffee, and she’s _never_ asked for help with homework before.”

She smiled despite herself. It was nice to hear an outsider agree with her. She squeezed Jess around the waist before letting her go. “Thanks.”

She just nodded and the two of them got back in the truck.

As she pulled out of the parking lot, Bella felt a little bad—it felt like the whole afternoon had been about her, rather than about what Jess had been feeling. “I know we didn’t get to talk about Mike much, but if you need to talk more, you could always call or text me. I’m here for ya.”

“Thanks,” Jess said with an odd smile. “But really the current issue is that I don’t have a date to the dance. Any chance you want to go stag with me and Angela?”

She was pretty sure Jess was pretending, at least to some degree. She was definitely still upset about things, but if she needed to talk about something else, that was okay with her. “I thought Angela was asking Eric,” she hedged. She was _also_ pretty sure, even if Angela wasn’t the gay friend Jess had almost mentioned, she wasn’t really into Eric. Still, it was strange that Jess immediately assumed they wouldn’t go together.

She shook her head dismissively. “Angela doesn’t really like him.”

Theory confirmed, Bella thought to herself. Partially, anyway.

“She’s totally been putting off asking him. She was really only going to ask so we could double date. If I don’t have a date, she probably won’t bother going through with it.”

“I really don’t like dances,” Bella said. “And I’m going to be out of town.”

“Liar,” Jess teased, but there was no heat behind it. “It’s fine. If you change your mind, though, the dream team will be ready for a new member.”

“Thanks,” she said, smiling slightly. For once, she could almost picture going to a school dance and having fun—staying pressed against a wall with Angela and watching Jess fist pumping and bouncing to whatever was playing, and definitely not dancing with Mike, who still might ask her, no matter how clear she had made it that she wasn’t into him.

But…she still shied away from the idea. Maybe she was nervous, on some level, that it was too good to be true. And a waste of money to get a _dress_ —ugh, even the thought made her shiver—and a dance ticket.

Would Edythe want to go? She’d agreed to go shopping but hadn’t mentioned the dance itself. Would she want to go together? Bella couldn’t decide if that was better or worse. She still wanted to say no, to run the fuck away. God. How did one handle this sort of thing?

One thing was for certain, though. She wanted to talk to Edythe again. Even one afternoon of not texting her was enough to make her miss her.

Tomorrow, Bella decided, she was going to talk to Edythe about what Emmett had said. She’d suss out whether she was in any danger—she suspected she was only in as much danger as she’d always been from Edythe. Maybe less, given that Emmett claimed Edythe didn’t want to kill her any more.

Okay, phrased like that, Jess’s concern about a cult was more realistic…she’d ask about that, too, just to be sure.

And, if she was brave enough, she’d even try to define the relationship. Her cheeks warm at the thought. Would they date? She could picture it, kind of. Holding hands as they walked around a park, sharing lunch, kissing…

She smiled. It wasn’t that she was giving up on the mystery of Edythe’s abilities, but for a minute, she thought it might be okay to set it aside and just focus on being a girl with a crush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my experience, coming out to friends is usually not such a big affair. But, this is Bella's first real experience with it, and that nervousness is real! Nowadays I just mention my wife and people can take it or leave it lol. One day that will 100% be Bella and Edythe, but right now, Bella's just a scared little bean.
> 
> I've pretty much made my decision regarding Jacob vs. Julie. Thanks to everyone who sent in suggestions :) 
> 
> I am still hoping to find a Native American beta!
> 
> Last few notes—I went back and made a few edits in a couple of the other parts of this. Most of them are small things. The biggest one is that Edythe tells Bella she's sixteen instead of seventeen. I explained my reasoning in the notes of that fic, but briefly: she's not really sixteen; in this story a few characters have been aged up for my own comfort. But she is _pretending_ to be sixteen at this moment. Bella still knows she isn't and figures out the immortality. 
> 
> When I began writing this fic, it was intended as a one-shot, which is why "what a stupid lion" is so completely different in tone and pacing. I fell in love with the story, of course, and now we're here! But, that means that a lot of the things I'm adding in now weren't planned from the beginning. So, when the Twilight arc of this fic is finished, I will be going back and doing a pretty big overhaul of the story—just neatening the edges and smoothing any plot holes—before I begin the New Moon arc. 
> 
> Thank you for reading!

**Author's Note:**

> Edit 1/7/19: Edythe originally referred to Jessica as Jess, mostly because I got used to calling her that while writing Bella's POV. It's been fixed now so that Edythe calls her Jessica.
> 
> This ended up being both more and less introspective than I expected. Edythe has a lot on her mind, I guess! I think we’ll definitely see more of her and Emmett reconciling, but that remains to be seen I guess, haha. 
> 
> I like to think that the Cullens buy new crates of books, everyone reads them, and then they donate all the books to libraries in the area. Spread out and anonymous, obviously. 
> 
> Lastly, an update from the last chapter:  
> 1\. I am looking for a Native American beta. There are huge problems with canon’s portrayal of the Quileutes, and I have a few ideas about how to change things for this story, but I want to make sure I don’t make things worse.  
> 2\. I am still wondering if you would prefer Jacob or Julie! As a reminder, Bella is bisexual, so it doesn’t have to be Julie for love interest reasons. Further, the love triangle is NOT going to happen, so don’t worry about that! Just go based on who you want to see!  
> 3\. You guys really don’t want the ot3, haha. That’s totally fine, I wasn’t all that into the idea, anyway! That being said, I still want to know if you have an endgame ship for Jacob/Julie. Feel free to give your reasoning for a certain ship, and to offer multiple options! If you would prefer one pairing for Julie and another one for Jacob, tell me that, too!


End file.
